Why?
Because they only occasionally encountered God in their churches and more often than not, they left a congregational meeting more thirsty for the reality of God, instead, they were filled up with information about God without actually drawing near to Him.
This, too, has been my experience.
"To seek and find God is everything."
There is something lacking in our churches today....something so basic.
I believe it is a true, souled-out, unencumbered, communing worship with the God of the universe.
We have bought into the lie that serving at church, fellowshipping with other church people, ministry training, is the same thing as actually seeking God.
I think of Moses and his encounter with God. Moses ascended Mt. Sinai, stood before the Great I AM, beheld the glory of the Lord all around him, heard the audible voice of the Lord, returned to the people and the bible says he "did not know that the skin of his face shone," The people were afraid to draw near to him because they saw that he had been with God.
That is what I am thirsty for-climbing up God's holy mountain to encounter Him in such a way that my very countenance is changed.
I'm not sure that it is possible to have such an encounter like that in church today, in fact, it would probably make most people uncomfortable.
We're too ordered, scheduled, and defined.
No room for the moving of the Holy Spirit here.(caution: quenching of the Holy Spirit could lead to a hard heart.)
And yet, I do encounter God and I experience sweet times of worshiping Him, talking with Him, seeking His heart and just being with Him.
Ironically, those encounters rarely happen at church and dare I say, never during worship.
My question is this: is there something wrong with me?
Am I the only one who feels this way?
Have I been so indoctrinated that I believe that the church is to provide all my spiritual needs and that fellowshipping with other believers is a substitute for a having a beautiful relationship with the Lord of the universe?????
It sort of reminds me of this current culture crisis.
Some people have come to believe that big government will solve all of our problems.
In like manner, some believe that big church is the answer to those who have a crisis of faith.
So, what is the answer?
Are my expectations too high for organized church?
Possibly....probably.
So, what is the purpose of being part of a church if I rarely encounter God within its confines?
I believe that God will provide me with wisdom that will lead to understanding and I also believe that it will be a process.(...is a process....still processing......)
(I'll get there.)
While I am still on this earth, I don't want to waste time worrying about "coloring within the lines" and, to be honest, my only desire is to please God, not man.(encumbrances, mentioned above.)
My true hearts desire would be to be part of a home-church; like-minded people gathered together for the sole purpose to worship God through studying His word, prayer, singing praises to His name, to be with people who have encountered God and to think that is the norm, not the exception, to be with people who are absolutely in love with Jesus, what I call "Jesus freaks."
Aahhh....that sounds heavenly.
Father,not my will, but Thine be done.
1 comment:
hi there Lori!
good post - i love how you shared your heart and i think most of us at some time or another has longed for more than the status quo. you may have read my post describing the church that we belonged to for about 10 years and how we made the very difficult decision to leave it last year. the time just came when we needed to seek out a fellowship that was more in line with what we felt God was calling us to. we were no longer interested in the megachurch structure where the little guy gets swept up and lost in the shuffle. and our new church does leave some things to be desired. we are not entirely happy with the style of leadership and the church body has been together for so long that they have become somewhat insular and dare i say it? cliquish. we have had a lot of trouble wedging ourselves in and finding our niche. no significant friendships have been made as yet. partly our fault, since we have not been able to join a small group with jim's travel schedule the way it is. so we're sort of treading water for now. we will stay where our kids are and that's it for now.
one thought that came to mind while i read your post was this. during our time at the big church, we learned a lot of things and one of the first lessons we learned - the hard way - was that WE are the church. we started out thinking things like, "i didn't like the music this morning, the pastor's sermon really left me cold ..." etc. over time, God dealt with us and made us see that we don't GO TO church - we ARE the church. we have been believers for quite some time. what about the person who walks through the door who has never had an encounter with Christ? we tried to keep this thought at the forefront of our minds each and every time we walked in the door. if something wasn't quite right for us that particular day, we gave it back to God and asked Him to bless someone else, reveal Himself to someone else. we tried to remember - it's about Him, not me.
i do believe that the type of church you are longing for should have a place in our routine. the intimate home gathering, the pure worship without all the trappings - we've experienced that very thing in our small groups over the years. does your church do small groups? perhaps we need to make room for both things in our lives - corporate worship where we go out attempt to be the church for someone who needs it, and the small intimate home gathering where we allow God to meet us face to face. what do you think?
this isn't as fleshed out as i would have liked since i'm already late for my shower and jim is tapping his foot at me, but we'll talk - i'll watch for you on FB!
have a blessed day!
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