So, God has totally been revealing His heart to me and has challenged me to love people the way that He loves them and then to ACT on that love.
"How?" I've been asking.
"Love them through my eyes" He has said to me.
And so I have been seeking to understand what makes people feel loved.
What is their love language and how can I fill their love bank not based on what makes me feel loved but truly understanding what actions I can show that would lead to them feeling loved and valued.
For instance: I feel most loved when people spend time with me and when people do special little things for me, so, my love language is time and gifts.
Lacey's love language is words of encouragment.
Nevada's is affection.
Con's is words of encouragement and affection and time.
So, if I want Lacey to feel loved/valued I shouldn't show her what makes me feel loved but what makes her feel loved so I would tell her how much she means to me
rather than getting her a gift, which is how I feel loved.
Conversely, I feel a little uncomfortable hearing words of affirmation because I would rather spend time with you in order to feel valued by you.
If Nevada needed encouragement I shouldn't tell her how much she means to me but rather I should show her by giving her a hug and expressing my love to her in the way she feels most loved.
God made all of us with unique features and He meets us where we are at, doesn't He?
What a great example He left for us to really meet people where they are and show them the love that He gave us.
With that in mind I thought it would be interesting to take a poll and hear what you feel is your love language.
I'll start:
Lori's love language is time and gifts
What is yours?
3 comments:
Thanks for the insight. I too love time, but not so much on the gifts. Although, if it makes you feel good to give me a gift, please go right ahead ;)! My other love language is words of affirmation, which is interesting that it isn't one of yours....so I wont' get too mushy with you! JK... It is hard to remember that we need to love others the way they want to be loved. I need to recheck my kids languages now that they are getting older. I'm pretty sure I know my dog's love language - time. She'd love me to just sit on the couch all day with a blankie covering her!!! Sorry, I just have to be silly, mostly to make those non dog owners (Jill) laugh!
P.S. I would love to give you all the time in the world, but forgive me if I fail on the gifts part!
I will check back to see what our other dear friends have to share too.
Great reminder especially around Christmas time. I know that your language is not supposed to change, but I think mine has changed over the years. It used to be gifts was a huge thing for me and now not so much. I would rather have words of affirmation, which is interesting because it is the hardest for me to give away. The theory is that whatever way it is easiest for you to give is usually your language. Maybe for me the hardest to give is the most valuable just because it is the hardest? Maybe that should be my new years resolution, give away words of affirmation.
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